Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: When politicians come to us, they're like, oh, we're going to fix this. We're going to. So recently, when, when America, like Trump says, I'm going to fix the. The immigration, I. I'm going to fix. I can really mimic it. I should stop that. But I'm. And it's going to be so good. So good.
[00:00:16] Speaker B: And you wouldn't know how that job. I'm unemployed, but I'm not adding anything.
[00:00:21] Speaker A: I want to be in this position at the job. What skills do I need and what do I value most? What matters to me and why? Why does it matter to me? Okay, great. Why is this important to me? You value this? Well, you look at it like, okay, I'm going to fix it. I'm going to do it. But no, I don't have the energy for it.
[00:00:37] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:00:37] Speaker A: You know, you were tired. It's like, I'm trying to raise a family. I'm trying to make money. I'm trying to build an organization. I'm trying to do all of this. Like, both of us are trying to do all of this, but yet our energy is scarce, our resources are scarce. And you know what happens when you have scarce resources and even energy, you know, against your needs? Stress.
[00:00:59] Speaker B: Stress.
[00:01:00] Speaker A: So you begin to get stressed and you do not realize it. So you're talking anyhow, you're unhappy, your mood is terrible, you're falling sick. You don't know what is really happening to you.
[00:01:11] Speaker B: One guy, yeah, they were divorced, and he made a profound statement. Just hit us like that, right? He said, yeah, my marriage did not work because I brought stress home.
[00:01:20] Speaker A: Yeah, that was really good. I love that guy. He says. He says, my marriage didn't work because I brought stress home. And that's what many of us do when we get into marriage. All of a sudden it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You. You can't control me. I don't think marriage is really like that. You know, I don't think because I'm married to you, I don't have to do this. I don't have to give this.
[00:01:42] Speaker B: No what I beg for.
[00:01:43] Speaker A: I'm like, hey, you traded that personal space that you had to have a guy who is going to lie by you, who'll be snoring the whole night. I mean, if you snore, forgive me. I'm just giving an example, you know? But that's what you did.
Hello. And wel up. My name is Emmanuel.
[00:02:04] Speaker B: And my name is Grace.
[00:02:05] Speaker A: And we are your partner in growth and effective Living. Thank you for tuning in. If you've been watching us for some time and you've still not subscribed, want to ask you for this great favor. Please go ahead and subscribe to our channel. Please, please. And if it is your first time, also go ahead. We promise you, you will love it here. This is a channel that is fully committed to growth and effective living. We've been talking about some things for the past two, three weeks. Some of the statements that we have heard in life that have really transformed the way we live our life. You know, the way we see things, the way we live our lives, the way we communicate, the way we interact. Of course we still own this growth journey, but it's been awesome.
[00:02:47] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:02:48] Speaker A: You want to share? I think this is my all time favorite. Really.
[00:02:51] Speaker B: Same here.
[00:02:51] Speaker A: Maybe because of my economics background, but I love every bit about that quote.
[00:02:55] Speaker B: Yeah, it's this profound quote from Thomas Soell that says there are no solutions, they are only trade offs.
[00:03:05] Speaker A: Yep. So powerful, powerful, so powerful. You know, trade offs in economics. And, and by the way, Thomas Soell is, is an economist and I think he was really speaking about this, you know, in terms of how politicians make promises. You know, when politicians come to us, they're like, oh, we're going to fix this. We're going to. So recently when, when America, like Trump says I'm going to fix the, the immigration, I, I'm going to fix, I can really mimic it. I should stop that. But I'm. And it's going to be so good. So good. And you wouldn't know how I actually did. And the people like, oh yeah, oh yeah. And then when they began to do it, like, oh, there is a problem.
[00:03:44] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:03:45] Speaker A: Because that's really what trade offs are. You, you are not really solving any problem.
You know, and I have to be careful here. He's not saying we are not solving the problem as in there are no solutions really. But he's saying that when politician says that we are going to fix one problem, they are only taking, you know, something from somewhere which is obviously going to cause another problem, you know, to this.
[00:04:11] Speaker B: Another thing.
[00:04:11] Speaker A: Yep, that's basically what he's saying. So he's not saying that we can fix like if there's healthcare, we can fix it.
[00:04:16] Speaker B: There are no solutions.
[00:04:17] Speaker A: Exactly. But then of course if you're gonna fix, then sometimes you're going to increase spending or sometimes you're going to increase.
[00:04:24] Speaker B: Taxes, sometimes you're going to cause unemployment.
[00:04:26] Speaker A: Exactly. Like so many things like when they said oh, the government is so bloated. We're going to fix it. We got people like, oh, we like that idea. Oh, the federal agency, you know, and then we're going to bring that idea. And then now people are like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not like that, not like that. I'm like, what were you expecting? You know, when we try to fix problems, we create more problems. And that is why all through history, I think one of the things that if you're a student of history, you will notice as we recycle problems yesterday they, I think Trump signed an executive order to begin the process of, you know, destroying the Department of Education. And we talked about this and I, like, this is funny because the bigger problem is the problem that began that solution, you know, because people were complaining that, hey, some of the states are being left out.
[00:05:20] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:05:20] Speaker A: Like you can have, depending on your state, you can have a quality education.
Exactly. And so, no, let's take it to the federal level so that education everywhere. And then now after some years, they're like, no, no, no, no, we're not better off. We have to take a bus to the state. I, I promise you one thing that will likely happen 10, 15 years from now. We're going to go back to the same thing.
[00:05:44] Speaker B: I'm sure I'll be the head of Department of Education.
[00:05:47] Speaker A: You're not a citizen, by the way. You know, but that's the thing. That's the, that's the funny part. We're going to go back to the very same problem. In economics. When we talk about trade offs, we are talking about the problem or the challenge that arises because of the constraints of resources. Remember we talked about the constraints in life.
[00:06:06] Speaker B: We don't have unlimited resources.
[00:06:08] Speaker A: And so those choices that we are making because of it, that is what trade offs are.
[00:06:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:14] Speaker A: And the reason why these are constraints is because we don't have them in abundance. And so when you make one choice, you are actually giving up on something.
[00:06:25] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:25] Speaker A: For this. That is exactly what you're doing. I want to save money. At the same time, I want to, I want to feed. At the same time, I have to pay my bills. At the same time. All of this is coming from your resources that are very limited. Limited. And so that created the need for choice.
[00:06:43] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:43] Speaker A: That is why when we talked about decision making, I said, what do you really want to prioritize in life is how to make informed decisions.
[00:06:51] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:52] Speaker A: You know, and, and as we continue our conversation today, you realize why this is so critical. Everything comes to choices.
[00:07:01] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:07:01] Speaker A: And the reason is because of the trade offs.
[00:07:03] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:07:04] Speaker A: If you're not careful and you don't understand the importance of making informed choices, you will always trade off one problem for the other. And you think you are solving the.
[00:07:16] Speaker B: Problem and sometimes you end up with a bigger problem that you were running away from. And that's what the last time I was talking to someone and I said when thinking about this code, right. That has been like fundamental to our marriage, our relationship and even our family. Understanding this, I was telling the person that, you know, life, it's, it's not as though we are able. Life is like, you know, a puzzle. So we fix it and then that's it. That's it. We've solved everything. It's making series of choices.
[00:07:47] Speaker A: Right.
[00:07:48] Speaker B: Because of one problem to the other and because everywhere in our lives.
[00:07:54] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:07:55] Speaker B: For example, family, somebody will say that, oh, okay, you know, we, we need. My last time we're talking about something, we're laughing, we're like, okay, maybe a couple, right? They are saying that, oh, okay, for us, we value maybe family. We want our kids to be groomed in a certain way. And we know that, okay, the nine to five will not cut it. If we are going for both of us. And then we decide, okay, maybe the woman stay home, you know, do something and then take care of the kids so that their homeworks, right. It's not somebody else raising your children. Or the man is doing that. And then fast forward. So we, we wanted something. We feel like the problem is that, okay, our children are not, you know, being groomed in the way we want. The schools are doing that for us and everything.
[00:08:40] Speaker A: Give up your work.
[00:08:40] Speaker B: Give up your work.
[00:08:41] Speaker A: Take care of the kids.
[00:08:42] Speaker B: Take care of the kids. Now one person does that. Then it means that now there's limited resources. Maybe together it was $2,000 you don't have $1,000 is gone. And then, and that's why we'll come back. We would delve deeper into why we need to make informed decision for this, you know, this particular situation. Right. Because at least when you make the informed decision, you know, it may not always be 100%. But like the expectation, the outcome is quite expected. So you are not now complaining, oh, now we don't have money. You are not bringing money home. You are not doing anything. Or even the, the one cup. The wife will say that, oh, so why are you not coming home? Or why are you not doing this? Am I not the one who is doing the work alone? Am not the, you know, so Those are unnecessary frustrations and you know, fights here, here and there.
[00:09:32] Speaker A: Yeah. And it happens because of scarcity. Life constraints. Again, if there were no constraints, oh my. I promise you we could live anyhow we want. We could do whatever we want.
[00:09:44] Speaker B: But there are constraints.
[00:09:45] Speaker A: There are constraints, there are energy constraints. There is a constraint of time, There is constraint of resources. There are even people constraints. You know, we all don't have the same skill set.
[00:09:56] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:09:56] Speaker A: We don't have the same mindset. We don't have the same heartset. So we talked about that. If you've not watched that video, go ahead and watch them. But understanding the constraints are so important because there is no perfect choice.
[00:10:08] Speaker B: Really.
[00:10:09] Speaker A: There's no perfect choice. There's no perfect choice. They're just trade offs.
[00:10:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:10:13] Speaker A: It's not like a choice that you're not losing anything. You're losing something. For every decision, for every choice, someone says that, oh, like we talked about people avoiding a state of singleness.
[00:10:24] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:10:25] Speaker A: So that it can be because they think it's shameful. When people ask you that, are you married?
They don't feel good. And so we want to avoid that feeling. And because we try to avoid that feeling, what we do, we might. And sometimes not. Like we marry the person that we love. Sometimes we don't even love them. Sometimes we're not even sure what we are doing.
[00:10:44] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:10:45] Speaker A: But we just do it anyway because. Or our friends are doing it and, and other people are doing it. And so we do it. We may not even be ready for it, but we just do it. So what happens? We trade away our singleness and freedom which has, you know, which, which has a. A big room for, you know, personal freedom and, and whatever you want to do and however you want to do it. Wake up. Whatever you want to spend your money.
[00:11:08] Speaker B: However you want to.
[00:11:09] Speaker A: And then now when we get into marriage, all of a sudden it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, you. You can't control me. I don't think marriage is really like that. You know, I don't think because I'm married to you, I don't have to do this. I don't have to give this.
[00:11:23] Speaker B: No. What I begain for.
[00:11:25] Speaker A: I'm like, hey, sincerely, this is the thing. Because you don't understand what you just did. You know, you, you traded that personal space that you had to have a guy who is going to lie by you, who'll be snoring the whole night. I mean, if you snow. Forgive me. I'm just giving an example.
You know, but that's what you did. And you're like, it's so annoying. I just want to sleep. You know, go buy the thing that they cover their ears. That's your problem. But I'm saying.
I'm just saying that like, I'm not saying that we cannot do anything to circumvent this. What I'm trying to say is that because there are no perfect choice, you go for informed choices. In other words, I must know what I'm going in for. I must know what I'm giving up for. Can you count the cost?
There are two cost, really. There's a direct cost, and other people may say indirect cost. But then I will say that there is the. The real cost and there is the opportunity cost. The real cost is basically the cost that you can calculate. For instance, I am going to buy this. It's a hundred dollars. Okay. That's the real cost, though. If I. Good. But opportunity cost is that if I buy this, if I have hundred dollars, and then I buy this, and I want two things. Okay, so I have $100, this product that I want. Let's say I want a jacket, and at the same time I want a shoe. Both cost $100, even if they don't. One cost 80, the other cost probably 800. And then I have $100 constraints.
[00:12:59] Speaker B: That's scarcity.
[00:13:02] Speaker A: So this is actually rooted in scarcity. So a hundred dollars is what I have, and yet I have to. I'm trying to meet these two demands. Yeah, okay. You know, the demand is the want that you have.
[00:13:16] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:13:17] Speaker A: Backed by purchasing power. It means you can afford something and you want the thing, but then you have a constraint which is you can't afford both. So you have to make a choice. If I choose the jacket, which is probably $80 or $100, I forgo the shoe. That's literally what you're doing. I forgot. I cannot choose it and then have this. That's it. The only way I can have both is that let's say it's $50. $50. And I can say, okay, while I can split it, I can afford it. And so I have to make a choice. And this is the problem I am seeing, especially with our generation, a lot of people, that we do not count the cost. Jesus. Says who built a house without first counting the cost? Count the real cost and count the opportunity cost. What am I for going. Sometimes it's difficult to estimate. Fine, I get it. But if you. If you really.
If you really freed yourself from the pressures of Friends, precious of society. So I tell people that take your time when you're making decisions.
[00:14:20] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:14:21] Speaker A: And try to ask yourself if you're of the general. There is a part where I ask you, I mean, how informed are you about this?
How informed are you? And then we also talk about the need to factor in human behavior. Human behavior that is also so important because, again, human beings are human beings. If you make decisions without factoring in human behavior, you are going to be in trouble. So we make decisions and we think that people are not going to change. Or I'll bring this in it in a setting like even a home, let's say you're gonna buy a house or you're gonna rent a house. Let's say it's a building, a new building, and then you're gonna rent. And then they say, oh, put this amount of money down as a security deposit. Like, why are they asking you for security deposit? Because they know human beings. No, human beings are gonna mess the thing up. They understand that.
[00:15:14] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:15:14] Speaker A: And because they know human beings are going to mess the thing up.
[00:15:18] Speaker B: That's deep.
[00:15:19] Speaker A: They try to have a guarantee. Yeah, okay. Or again, they try to ensure the risk. They want to make sure that, you know what, people can be people. And so that's the thing that happens sometimes in my teams. Maybe there is a challenge and someone is saying that there is a problem. And oftentimes when they say the problem is like, I can see that they think I don't understand them. Or I'm not. Oh, maybe I'm thinking that I'm not. I'm not seeing what they are seeing. And often I tell them that I see what you see. I get you. Okay. But you are not proposing a solution. You are. You are taking one problem, you know, and. And replacing it with a bigger problem. I'm trying to say, what are the benefit? What are you getting? Okay, what will be the alternative?
[00:16:07] Speaker B: Alternative?
[00:16:08] Speaker A: Because when you understand human behavior, I say, okay, you know what, what about if we train them in this way? Oh, no, no, they can be trained. Okay, great. If they cannot be trained, what. What can happen?
[00:16:18] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:16:19] Speaker A: Do they need help? Do they need support? I try to understand it's the best thing to do. Because if you're not careful, you will trade off one problem, which was a problem, but it was a lesser problem to deal with, to deal with, and replace it with a bigger problem. Because you didn't understand human behavior.
[00:16:37] Speaker B: That's why companies like banks can give loans to people.
[00:16:40] Speaker A: Right.
[00:16:41] Speaker B: Because of human behavior. They know not even not because people may lose their jobs or other things, but they just know. So they factor. And then that company will say, okay, let me buy a guarantee. So that company now goes to another company and says, you know what? I have this pool of loans. Can you. Then they will pay.
[00:16:59] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah.
[00:17:00] Speaker B: Had they not been for human behavior, they wouldn't have taken some of these steps. And when we're talking about making informed decisions, one of the key points to highlight is first of all, like, I have two situations. Like, you give the, the scenario. The first thing I have to ask myself, has this problem existed before?
[00:17:19] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:17:20] Speaker B: Then how. What solution was given, was given to that? And what was the impact of that, of that solution?
[00:17:27] Speaker A: That's. That's a profile.
[00:17:29] Speaker B: Because, like, recently you were sharing. I didn't watch that. But after you watch, you were sharing me. Dr. Minsa Otabil's conference.
[00:17:37] Speaker A: Oh, yes, the Diolos conference. Yes.
[00:17:39] Speaker B: I watched a bit. I couldn't finish. But then we were discussing it. Right. And he was talking about the charismatic church, you know.
[00:17:45] Speaker A: Yeah, the problems he foresees.
[00:17:47] Speaker B: Yeah, the problems he foresees. And he has a point. Because sometimes, like, we see complaints. We see how people are just setting up churches here and there, doing this, deceiving people, beating people and all the other things. But now, let's see. I mean, I'm in my own contest. The. There's a. A new institution that says there's going to be a governing body before you set up a church, you come.
[00:18:09] Speaker A: Or we're going to regulate all.
[00:18:11] Speaker B: We are going to regulate everyone. You go through this school at this point, you do this. This one is going to. It's almost like I'm. I mean, I'm just. It's almost like, you know, in the past, the Catholic Church, you know, idea.
[00:18:25] Speaker A: Yeah, right. I think the proposed solution is church governance and other things. And I thought they were brilliant. But then again, that's exactly what created some of the churches that we have today, which actually created the charismatic movement.
[00:18:38] Speaker B: Exactly. Because.
[00:18:39] Speaker A: Not because they were bad, because they were overly governed. And there were a lot of politics. Politics.
[00:18:44] Speaker B: Sometimes people feel like they're supposed to be.
[00:18:46] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:18:46] Speaker B: You know, it's time for me to be a pastor or an elder or this. And it's never my intern there. So though maybe the person has giftings, then the person decides that, you know.
[00:18:54] Speaker A: And so they go solo. And then the people are like, oh, wow, they're gifted. Because their giftings were not suppressed by probably even what to teach and how to teach. You Know, we had books that were written or sermons that we have to read and that created the same thing.
[00:19:08] Speaker B: Like people say, then the Holy Spirit is no, how should I read my sermon? How would the Holy Spirit talk?
[00:19:12] Speaker A: They tried to have doctrinal fidelity and so they consolidated the teachings. They created books where the sermons that you're going to teach, you know, in your church and other people, they would literally have to read and all of that. And people felt like, nah, you're suppressing the giftings of the Spirit.
Exactly. It created that. And now because of the Charismatic movement, we say, oh, we see the danger. No, we're calling them, let's look at how these people did it, that they've stayed relevant. Yeah, but we forget that that is what actually created a Charismatic. And so, you know, I foresee that we will also go back. Then the Charismatic movement or a lot of these big churches in court will become like those ones. And then now individuals will break out again, again. And then probably they wouldn't call it Charismatic church, but they'll call it something. So if you go through history, you notice that there is a cycle. We continue, human beings continue to recycle the same problems over and over. Because when we think we had a solution, then we realize that, oh, there's a bigger problem. And then we go back to the same thing. I'll give you another example. When atheism, like recently there was a, you know, in America, a lot of people started talking about this move of atheism and all of that. And then now they start, they saw what is creating of meaninglessness among young people and wokism, and they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, let's go back to Christianity.
[00:20:35] Speaker B: Let's go back, should come back to the schools again.
[00:20:37] Speaker A: I'm like, okay, what are we doing? You know, and, and, and I foresee that probably some state will start doing it and then we will give it 10, 15 years. We'll go back to the same thing. And that is why it's so difficult. I always say this to some of the young people. I do know that you have to always have a strong why for what you do. Imagine you think you're going to change the world. I know a lot of people might be watching us right now and say, oh my God, today they are just talking about politics. It's relevant to your home. Yeah, many times we think we're fixing what that's why. You know, recently I shared a video with you about why couples fight over the same thing, like over and over. Again, the reason is because, again, and I think the lady said, I really love that she said, we're not fighting about something, we are fighting for something, you know, but, but what I waving at is that it's because of the trade offs. Because a lot of the problems we face in our marriage arise because of scarcity and constraints. That's why we fight over issues. And those scarcity and constraints are not going away.
[00:21:37] Speaker B: No.
[00:21:38] Speaker A: So many times you notice that, for instance, if people don't have a lot of money, you know, they don't have money right now, like they are fighting over some issue, they get money, that problem will go. And then another problem was that, you know, maybe making time or stuff like that, then another, you know, because the constraints are not just one thing. The constraints are not. That's, you know, previously people didn't used to factor people as constraints. But when we talked about that, I said three important aspects of people. Their heartset, their mindset, and their skill set. Their, their constraints.
[00:22:10] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:22:11] Speaker A: You, you value this. The person doesn't value things. That's what a heart set constraint is. We don't value the same thing. What is important to you is not what is important to me. Mindset. We don't perceive things the same way how I perceive things, not how. So we talked about how we fix it. We fix it through effective communication. Well, a skill set, what we do and how well we do it. We don't do it the same way. One can cook probably better. The other one can do this, one can do that. What can. We don't need to fight over that. We just need to complement each other. And I said the way we fix the skill set gap is actually to share knowledge, you know, share our skills. If I don't. Or to do the things that you cannot do.
[00:22:51] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:22:51] Speaker A: So you can do that. I would do that. It's okay. Like, I clean the house a lot, probably almost all the time. And the reason is because I'm better with keeping our house than you do. And, and you cook. I barely cook. Because you're better doing that. Right. And even in economics, they call something comparative advantage and absolute advantage. This is where comparative advantage comes in. It's like you can do several things, but why should I do this? And they factor in the very same thing. Opportunity cost. They say, okay, maximize the one that you have low opportunity cost in. It's like, what do I have to forego to do this? Like, if two people in a marriage, one is making probably $20,000, okay. And then she can also Cook or she can actually do well with the kids. And then you say, no, no, no, no, no. You can teach the kids better, so you come teach the kids. Okay, just stop the work. You're for going $20,000.
[00:23:46] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:23:47] Speaker A: Like a month. That's literally what you do. And then if the man is doing maybe a job that she. He's making $5,000, then he said, like, I am the man for me. That's stupid. Like, I'm serious. You might say, oh, maybe. Well, I can't teach much. Well, can I learn you? You. You take care of the kids.
[00:24:05] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:24:06] Speaker A: Like, there's no shame in it. It's. Oh, no. What about society? What society? Like, who is society? You get what I mean? Like, who is society? It's you, your family, your house. You're looking at what is the best thing for your family. You're talking about society. So that's why I love this.
[00:24:23] Speaker B: I love it so much. And you know, the, the thing is, like, we've talked about this. Constraints, constraints, people. Someone will ask then how do I go about it? I think we've given a lot of cues, but one thing I, I keep telling myself, and we, we showed it in our diagram, right? Our state of flourishing, you know, is values, right?
[00:24:45] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:24:45] Speaker B: Ask yourself that at this point. Like you said, sometimes people don't have money today. Another time that would. They will have money. Then another problem. So at every point in time. That's why I said, it's not like life is like a puzzle that you. You are.
[00:24:58] Speaker A: Okay, that's true.
[00:24:59] Speaker B: After you get the money, everything solves. It wouldn't. Children are coming. They have to go to school. This will happen.
[00:25:05] Speaker A: You may not even have children sometimes.
[00:25:06] Speaker B: You may have children, but you don't have time. So what matters to me most today? And what am I willing to let go of exactly. To be able to maximize. Like you've talked about all these constraints.
[00:25:17] Speaker A: I.
[00:25:18] Speaker B: There's. There's no way. I remember some time ago, first I, I finished college and I, I wanted to take my professional exam. So I remember within one year, I told myself, look, I want to get this done. So I shut out a lot of things. Fine. Some people were fighting with me because, oh, you are not calling me.
[00:25:38] Speaker A: You're not doing all that.
[00:25:39] Speaker B: You're not doing all. They are not spending time. You're not coming. Sometimes your phone, your phone, you know, social media. Sometimes. Okay, I'm not going to do this. I'm not going because there's something I know that I can't Be everywhere. There's no way I'll pass this exam. If I'm going for a party, if I'm going for wedding, if I'm going to this, I'm going. Sometimes that is the. That's the only way. That's the only way. Look at in this moment, what matters to me. Eventually, after I finish it. Sometimes, like you have 30 days and you are so freeze. Like, oh, what is that? Then you started something, but then I started something else.
[00:26:09] Speaker A: And then it continues.
So we're going to show the model on life constraints.
[00:26:14] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:26:14] Speaker A: You can see that we've categorized them into people, energy, material resources, all in relation to time. And these are four constraints that are important for you to really look at. People. Your heartset, your mindset, your skill set. Like you said, begin from there. What do I value most? What matters to me and why? Why does it matter to me? Okay, great. Why is this important to me? Great. Your mindset. How do I perceive things and why? Why do I see these things this way? If you missed our episode last, you know, last two weeks, go back and watch that. We talked about perspective and perception. Powerful, powerful conversation. Go back and watch that. It helps with the mindset. Why do I perceive things the way this way? Why am I looking at this this way? It's one of the reasons why you feel the way you feel. That's the reason why you are chasing feeling. Yeah, you fix it. You fix the way you feel. Then look at your skill set. Right? What do I do? What can I do? How best can I do it? So at this point, like you talked about, what matters to you? The value. Okay, what skills do I need? Like I want to marry. What skills do I need? I want to go to work. Okay. I want to work here. What skills do I need? Always ask yourself those questions.
[00:27:23] Speaker B: Oh, I'm not getting a job. I'm unemployed, but not adding anything.
[00:27:26] Speaker A: I want to be in this position at the job. What skills do I need? And prioritize those skills. Then look at your energy because again, you realize that you value this. Well, you look at it like, okay, I'm going to fix it. I'm going to do it. Okay. And then your skills is like, okay, I know the skills that I want, I want to grab, but no, I don't have the energy for it.
[00:27:47] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:27:47] Speaker A: You know, you were tired, you go to work, you come back, it's like you barely can read anything. You are trying to just upskill, but you don't have the energy. So that's it. And so look at my energy and see how we can actually manage our energy. And our advice is use an energy scheduler or what we call calendars, digital calendar, paper calendar, whatever it is. Or if you have a general, if you have a general, it helps you.
[00:28:11] Speaker B: Please get our journal.
[00:28:13] Speaker A: Please, please do get our journal. The link is in the description, you find it on Amazon. It's called Effective Living Journal. Go get it. And so you can then be able to plan your time. Say I'm going to use this time and focus on them. Things may go wrong, fine, but always come back to that and say, okay, this is because your calendar is showing you what is important to you.
[00:28:32] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:28:33] Speaker A: And the second thing is again your budget which is showing you what is important to you in terms of your material resources. So budget it and say, okay, I'm going to spend. We have a policy, we spend in our system. We have notion system that will help you live better. Please Visit our website mygrowthclub.org yeah, for them, go get them. They will really change your life. But if you don't buy, fine, it's okay.
[00:28:57] Speaker B: You are not a good advertiser.
[00:28:59] Speaker A: I mean, if they don't want to buy, what can I do? I'm not saying don't buy, but if you don't buy it doesn't mean you don't have to do it. You can still do this. You can have a simple system. You can, maybe it could be your phone, you know, you know, just spend whatever you want to spend first on people planning. I'm going to spend this on this, I'm going to spend this on that before the income comes. And then at the end of the, you know, the other month, you track before you plan again. So you track and say, okay, how did I spend it exactly? Where did I go wrong? Why did I go wrong?
[00:29:29] Speaker B: This way is the need to make realistic adjustments.
[00:29:31] Speaker A: And then you make those adjustments for the next month and then you plan again. It will not take more than one hour of your time. Just do that.
[00:29:38] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:29:38] Speaker A: And then when you do this again, look at all of these things in constraints of time. We have short term, long term, some things may be important to you right now, even in terms of your heartset and yet five years from now it would have changed. So time constraints, so important and so necessary. I don't know. But we can keep going on and on. But I hope that people have really enjoyed it. Have you enjoyed it? Let us know in the comment session. Have you learned something? Let us know in the comment session. And I, I Truly believe that if you listen to these things and you pay attention to them, you change your life.
[00:30:12] Speaker B: Yeah, I could.
[00:30:13] Speaker A: I could. I could say that 90% of the problems I've seen in marriages as a result of this, like, it's not because people are bad people. Yeah, they're trying to meet insatiable needs with scarce resources, you know, and they just don't see it. Yeah, it's like, I'm trying to raise a family, I'm trying to make money. I'm trying to build an organization. I'm trying to do all of. Like, both of us are trying to do all of this, but yet our, you know, our energy is scarce, our resources are scarce. And you know what happens when you have scarce resources and even energy, you know, against your needs. Stress. So you begin to get stress, and you do not realize it. So you're talking anyhow, you're unhappy, your mood is terrible, you're falling sick. You don't know what is really happening to you because that's what happens.
[00:31:06] Speaker B: And stress is.
[00:31:07] Speaker A: And stress destroys everything.
[00:31:08] Speaker B: You know, we're watching.
[00:31:09] Speaker A: It blocks your mind.
[00:31:10] Speaker B: Recently and one guy, yeah, they were divorced, and he made a profound statement. It just hit us like that, right? He said, yeah, my marriage did not work because I brought stress home.
[00:31:21] Speaker A: Yeah, that was really good. I love that guy. He says. He says, my marriage didn't work because I brought stress home. And that's what many of us do. We bring stress from work. We bring stress everywhere. And I thought, wait, he didn't say I took the stress from home. He says, so my marriage was okay, but I brought stress home to it. And at that time, he was building his business, he says, and so things are not going well. He comes back home, he's not able to disconnect. He's not able to tell his brain that this is home, this is not work. It's like he brings the same thing, and that's the way we are. Human beings are like that. If you understand these constraints and you understand what is really going on in life and you understand all of these against your needs, I could advise that. Don't want many things, but I know you're not going to listen. So want whatever you want, but understand the constraints in life. And we will be back probably next week to talk more about these things. Thank you so much, baby, for being here. If you've not subscribed, please go ahead and subscribe. And if you have not purchased our journal and our systems, please, please, from the bottom, we want to beg you I don't know. You want us to sing? Please, go ahead and buy it. Buy it?
Buy the Journal, Buy the Notion Systems and they will change your life. Thank you so much for being here. See you another time. Bye.
